TRAVEL SAFETY TIPS

During a flight, you may experience sudden loss of pressure, roof flying off, jet engine exploding, terrorist bomb detonating, etc. You may need to get to the exit of the plane. If so, make sure you keep these tips in mind (if you’re not crapping your pants or having end-of-life sex with your neighboring passenger(s)):

Thank you, and have a safe trip.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.